Sep 13, 2011

Ex-pression ??

Yes, I might sound silly for this very post. But don't I majority of the times do that anyways?
Ohk. Don't answer that one.

So, here I go...

There are certain things that one can't help. They are ingrained in us. Not that a therapy might always be worthless. But then, who's going looking for one!! We are good as we are. For we like being ourselves. At least for that wee bit of time, when we actually be. For that time, when we don't have to think before saying or acting. Our real time with selves. The time when we shed our clothes of social behavior, and talk to ourselves sparing the conditioned brain circuits of thinking, and not letting the worry of interpretations alter the feeling. The feeling that we basically feel, one which we would have expressed had we been a kid. And the kind of kid, who could word his/her inner within aptly.

On a second thought, that doesn't exist. For,before a kid learns about the various kinds of emotions he harbors, he's trained about taming them.
Yup, they say 'To foresee, is to be forearmed.'
Arming a kid with the weapons of societal mannerisms.
Not that it is bad.
Mannerisms and conditioning are essential for a society to be healthy. After-all, curbing the instinctive actions to the random array of thoughts, IS the crux of a civilization.

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But then, nothing in this universe is absolutely flawless. Even an atom has positive and negative particles.
In the process of civilization, the rawness of natural expression is, somewhere being subjected to such high pressures that if it goes on for few more centuries like this, then we could only be left with fossil remains. The work-culture and the stress is, already enough the heat to make the conditions more conducive for the transformation. Transformation to the soul which lives for the society and not for themselves. Whose each action would be planned so that it does not fail in the process of scrutiny and ends up building the perfect image that they want themselves to be portrayed in as.

Sometimes, all one wants is, to do a thing. Out of random, instinctive impulse. Or whatever you name it. Not thinking about whether it is right or wrong. You just wanna say/do it. Sans any cortical inhibitions.
Those, in my view, are the true emotions. Which when expressed/ given way to, can rejuvenate you; make you feel alive and kicking; make you feel like that bird in that vast sky- free; make you soak every bit of that feeling and bask for a while in its aroma.

Expression is the gift of nature. And, we shouldn't be keeping it wrapped in us. The joy in letting go our real self, for a few seconds even, is far beyond a millenium years spend in this masked life. No matter, how silly it might seem to others, the utmost satisfaction of being true and expressive is one, which no one can take away from you.

PS:
It's silly, to update a relationship on social networking sites. But, the joy of seeing his name with mine, on my profile, is another feeling altogether. One which I can't put into words.

Yes, it is kiddish. But, it is like that chocolate to me, that I wouldn't have traded even for a toy.

Not that, without it, it won't be a truth. But then, there are certain things which, when you see/remember, give you an exemplary feeling, the reasons to which nobody knows why. They just act as euphoric shots. Some might get it with drugs, the others with appreciation. I, strangely, have felt the same whenever I look at his name integrated in my profile.



This IS the first place where publicly I'm documented to be his. IT IS SPECIAL.

And, I totally love it.

It is like shouting from the top of Mt. Everest and letting the whole of the universe be a witness to the awesomest thing that ever happened to me.

PPS:
Btw, ever tried that? Shouting from the peak of a mountain???
Do try it once.
I'm sure you would love it.

2 comments:

Ankit said...

It didn't sound silly !

In the initial part, you were talking about the inhibitions and later you were justifying the impulses. I am not sure if it is the same thing and may be you don't mean them to be the same. Just that impulses can't be justified by the need to remove inhibitions.

Nevertheless, both of them deserve to be a part of the discussion which deals with the truthfulness of behaviour.

Tele Jane said...

Uhmm...Well, containing impulses is a kind of inhibition for souls like me. But, not always though. Sometimes, you feel you are holding too much onto your real self, and that is what might become suffocating.

And, yes...I am not trying to justify impulses on the basis of inhibitions, and neither am I trying to justify a breach of privacy on the grounds of impulsivity. Uhmm...Well, containing impulses is a kind of inhibition for souls like me. But, not always though. Sometimes, you feel you are holding too much onto your real self, and that is what might become suffocating.

And, yes...I am not trying to justify impulses on the basis of inhibitions, and neither am I trying to justify a breach of privacy on the grounds of impulsivity.