May 23, 2012

What a big fuss is it if the person you are marrying is not a doctor and you're one??

Ages have gone by and we still have kept the notion of 'A Doctor's
best suitor is a doctor' alive. Yes, even I blindly believed it till I
had a reason to prove it wrong. Love.

The war of my worlds had begun, I thought. Putting forth the liason to
my family and their prompt approval felt great. His family, too, were
indeed happy, for their son had sought a girl. (The fact that he could
was a reason in itself for celebration.) ;-)

The fight that I had thought would be tough, and would have to be
fought with all the weapons out in the open was not a fight at all.
Their were no soldiers firing at me, no archers aiming at me, no
arguements thrown at me. Infact, this was a storm inside me, which I
had to calmen at my time of committment...this was the question within
me, which I had to answer...this was the decision that I had to firmly
take by myself....merely because of the myth our society has created
and believed ever since. In the absence of such a notion, I would not
have to give my 'Non-medic' guy so much of thought.

Anyways, being officially together was a relief and bliss. Some people
applauded my breaking the league, some people still pestered that
'Doctors understand each other's lifestyle better'. Fine.



Life is merrier and beautiful. Our wedding dates have been finalized.
8 months later we would be Man and Wife. Amidst such happiness,
there's another such upheavel whose genesis I find stupid, and
explanations unnecessary. For now, those storms, questions and my
decisions are not inside me, they are in the people I meet. For open
discussions, as if it were a debate competition or a panel discussion
with the people no less than 'experts'.

People are more interested in quoting the 'failed' cases to prove the
general notion than thinking about who they are arguing with. Even
that is fine, until they start predicting the future about how he
would dislike my night duties, how he wouldn't be able to understand
the pressures of this profession, how the professional life would
creep and kill my personal life. n blah n blah.

Sometimes, I wish I could hand them over a trophy and end the
conversation. They'll atleast feel a winner, how-so-ever insensitive
they might be.

Then, sometimes, I wish I could aggressively open fire and go -'Being
a doctor doesn't mean I can't marry a mortal human, when I too am the
same.' ; 'My specy hasn't changed. Not that I am a Homo sapiens
doctairre.' ; 'When did being a doctor become the minimum eligibility
to understand another doctor?'

But then, I don't.

For they would never understand.

For when I am happy, I don't need to shout and tell them that I am.
They'll know with time.

For one day, seeing me content, they'll quote my example to argue with
the one who says that 'Doctors should marry doctors'.

For the time will come, when such obsolete notions will disappear.

And even if it doesn't...I don't give it a damn! Shaping our life is
in our hands and our hearts. No false belief can distort it.


PS: The story and lives of two people are known to none other than
those two people themselves.

PPS: Love trespasses caste, creed, gender, professions.

Apr 27, 2012

Wild I go...

There's a good news I have to break here:
I'm getting married on the 1st of the Valentine Month next year, to my best guy friend. After an year of smooth, lovely and laughter-filled courtship, I know my life with him is not going to be any different.


Now that my marriage dates have been finalized, there's a whole lot of new things popping in my naughty mind (Naughty because I'm going to emotionally blackmail my family to fulfill these wishes in the name of me leaving them). Here's the list of the things I would want to do (atleast once) before I get 'taken'.


10 Things to do before I get married:


1. Get a pup for myself. (He hates them!!)


2. Get a bunch of tattoos made. (I'm sure he mustn't be very fond of them.)


3. Get myself a shape. (It's not exactly beautiful to be in a disproportionate body.)


4. Get a girly gang ready for a 2-3 day trip. (This is practically an impossibility with my current friends.)


5. Organize a Spinster's for myself, whose dress code would be 'minimalistic' and dance style 'dirty'. (Oh, I so miss my hostel parties.)


6. Paint 3 giant paintings in my current room and one more 'big' wall space in Dad-Mom's room. (This I will anyhows do!)


7. Take some vows in the name of God, so that I get a way to stop my parents from giving me expensive unnecessary stuff on marriage.
(They won't listen to my wishes otherwise.)


8. Go for a bike trip with my brother and explore the terrains of India. (Even a 2-3 day trip must be fulfilling.)


9. Go to a theatre and whistle loudly on dialogues and dance on fast numbers, like crazy. (I, sure, need my college friends for this.)


10. Smoke a cigarette, just one 'kash'. (Quite unlikely I'll do this.)




Wanna actually go wild, before I take the docile pet form. ;-)

Apr 10, 2012

Bin tere...

---------------------------------------
Two weeks before Sangeet
---------------------------------------
Ti: 'All right. It all has been very unorganized.'
Te: 'Oh yeah. I knew this would happen if we leave it for later. We ought to think about a theme, gal.'
'I was all the time waiting for you to do it. But, you had studies.'
'And you told me you'll decide that with Jeej.'
'Ohhh please, he knows nothing about these events. You knew that.'
'Yeah, I know that. :P'
'So, atleast decide your song.'
'Let's first decide yours and Jeej's.'
'That we both will do.'
Questioning, raised eyebrows, 'Ohkay.'

---------------------------------
A day before Sangeet
---------------------------------
Ti: 'What is the solo song that you've decided?'
Te: 'Let me see. Let the rest of things fall in place first. Yours and Jeej's not yet upto the mark. Mine, I'll see later.'
'Later? Do you want to dance at all, in a solo performance?'
'Haa Baba! Want to. But just can't get any time. You know na!'
'You better find a song.'

------------------------------------
Morning of 'The' day
------------------------------------
Brother: 'When will you practice yours, Te?'
Te: 'And what if I say I don't want to.'
'Doesn't matter. You'll rock anyways, even without a practice.'
'And what if I say I don't want to give a solo at all.'
'I'll say you're being bad.'
'What was last you saw me dancing alone?'
'Hmmm... A...Monu's marriage.....No....it was you and her. A....Jeenu's...Ah...Naah. Yeah...Been Quite long.'

-------------------------------------
During the function
-------------------------------------
Ti; Sad faced, almost about to cry, 'You're not dancing for me, on my marriage, na?'
Te: 'No. I am. Can it ever happen that way? Idiot.'

5 minutes later, for her sister's wishes, against her own wishes she was on the stage. Dancing. Alone. Without her. In the last many years of her life.
------------------------------------
I miss you, darling. Immensely.
I am all alone without you.
I am incomplete.
I LOVE YOU, Ti!!
---------------------------------

I HATE marriages!!

My hatred towards wedding celebrations is probably due to the surrounding environment I have lived amidst. Criticism, Allegations, Outshowing each other, Judgements...all the kinds of negative emotions and vibes are related to it.

Why does wedding become a platform to show off your riches?

And why does even a middle class man try to conceal that he is not rich?

Why do people judge a marriage by the no. of dishes and kind of decorations?

Why does the society want to live it this way when the majority of middle class men are dying under the burden of the expenses incurred for marriage?

Why doesn't the middle class man stop pretending?

Why doesn't the middle class man become wise to understand this chakravyueh?

Why do we have to invite so many people for the function? In previous times, those all relations were close. But, in present times, we hardly interact with them.

Why do we want to follow the rituals of past in present times where they have lost their essence?

Why do we have to invite all those who invited us for their celebrations? Why a tit-for-tat?

Why do the hosts feel bad when some people couldn't turn? Reasons could be genuine.

Why does it become a point for keeping grudges?

Why have marriage celebrations become big social obligations and not realistic happy affairs?

Why have marriages now become only a matter of money?

How much did girl's father give to his son-in-law? How much did the girl's parents give to their daughter? How much did the maternals give? How much did he/she put in the 'lifaafa'? How expensive a gift did he/she give?

Why have blessings become measurable and comparable in greens?

Why do the parents falsely name these social obligations as rituals or 'our love' or 'our dream' for you?

Has money taken the place of love?

If dowry was a menace in medieval times, then wedding functions are the menace of today.

And why, despite knowing and hating and not wanting to become a part of such a menace, should people have to participate and follow what the world does?

A disadvantage of being a social being, I guess.

Yes, I hate attending marriages for I hate shows of the fortune that people put up.

All the more, I hate that even I will be having such a kind of a marriage and that my marriage will not be a simple court marriage/ a small family affair!!

:::::::::::I HATE marriages !!:::::::::::::
!But, I do love you, Mr. Nobody!

Dream : Kindle : Accomplished

One dream accomplished:
Buying an Amazon Kindle e-book reader.
Searched the Amazon Store, felt it was expensive.
Tried contacting all the friends and friends of friends if anyone was arriving from USA, but to no avail.
OLX Second hand deal, almost finalized, unluckily was sold a day before we were to make payments.
ebay New Kindle Keyboard 3G Wi-fi ordered as the Deal of the week. Otherwise, Indiaplaza sells it cheaper.

Next dream: :::Confidential:::
Planning: Check
Blueprint: Ready
Finances: to be arranged
Anticipated time of accomplishment: July 2012
Kindle's supposed to be delivered in 4 days from today.
Eager to see how it would be like!
Althought technically it ain't any accomplishment, but just a purchase.
Yet, later I'll be paying for it from my earnings.
Promise.

Vicious

Bound. In invisible non-existent wires.
Till when will I want to do things which I don't want for myself.
Will there be a time when I will finally do things which are silly and stupid and impractical and my desires?
Whom am I trying to prove myself to...??
This vicious cycle...has to stop.
If I don't rise to myself, If I don't stay firm on my words and actions...no one shall consider my plans for myself.
I should not do what I don't think is right. No benefits of situations to anyone. No considerations. No situation ruled decisions.
:::::::::::::::::03/04/2012::::::::::::::::::
:::::::::No COMMENTS, Please:::::::::

Mar 28, 2012

Why do you??

This blog was started 3 and a half years back with a poem that I had
written for my Mom-Dad's Anniversary...and a write-up for an
ever-vivid Rain shower with my college friends on Friendship's Day.

I felt I could be articulate enough to hold people's interest.

This blog became a way for me to put forth my views, my rebellion, my
opinion and my heart out.

From properly structured posts, to random ramblings, to serious
matters, to just timelining my life's events, and to merely speak to
myself...this blog has presented it all.

Time and again, I did not have resources/ time to take care of this
place. It had to be closed, twice. There was a time, when I felt it
was sort of insignificant to write whatever I wrote. There was a time,
when I felt it was unjustified to put in words whatever momentary
struck me.

Breaks and patch ups, my love story with my blog has been great. It
has taught me; it has nourished me - in thoughts and articulation.
This blog stands a proof to my evolution, however minute it may be.

It is not a blog anniversary I'm celebrating.

In idleness, scrolling down the posts from past, today it felt
beautiful and contenting. Happy smilies showed up on my face and
today, I asked myself 'Why do I blog?'

...the answer to which...
(today, I feel is,)

Because I like reading myself
...through my own eyes and mind...
Because I like re-living the feeling
...through my own words and phrases.
Because every post is special, every post carries its own
remembrances...and every post has a bit of
me-of-the-time-I-witnessed-it-all.
This blog is like my pensieve and the posts are my memories.

By the way, Why do you??

Mar 24, 2012

The Hypocrite Humans

It all is different. We all are hypocrites.

Fundas and theories all stand apart when the reality stares you back in your face.

We are not idealists. We are prone to attraction, jealousy, pride and fright.

We are humans. We can't forget, and can't easily forgive.
We wait...for hours, days, years...for the loved one to turn up.

We love, and want to be loved. We want to be that special someone, that 'most important' person in someone's life.

Yes, we want to be successful. We want to be famous. We want to be spoken of, with regard.

We are possessive. 'I wouldn't mind your spending time with someone for work or leisure.' We say this, when inside us, we fear to lose.

We love attention.

We get angry on the ones we own.

We're selfish. For our happiness, our desires.

We break rules, our believes change, our moralities twist.

We do everything to accomodate the one we love in our lives.

We shout. We rush.
We love. We scream.
We melt. We break.
We hit. We fight.
We defend. We sin.

For we are humans. The hypocrite humans.


PS: I don't want to be anything else than this. I love the grey in me.
(24th February, 2012)

Mar 17, 2012

Hiyaa

Hey, you, yes the one reading me...I've got matter. To write a book. On marriages and psychology and behaviour patterns of the Indian family. On rituals, their significance and their genesis. This one marriage made me learn all this. You think I'm drunk, no?? Nopes, fed up. Btw, this was my sis' wedding. And, I was supposed to be married to one hell of an awesome guy in the next March. Period. Nopes, The guy's the same. And, the nature's even better. But, its not the next March. Am loving it so much. Not the fact that I'll be marrying late. But, that I get to take on with the life unmarriedly. Without the 6 metre cloth snake called Saree. For the events, one has to wear that or another heavy skirt called Lehenga which is enough to smoothen the movements and curtail walking fast of the bride. Settle that. I'll be settling some one and a half years from now, in the arms of the man who loves teasing me to tears. Yes, our plans got delayed. Coz, life is not the way we want it to cruise like. Winds and waves also govern it. My exams, his exams, our future. Even after my marriage, we'll anyways not be together. He in Hyderabad, if things go as planned and I, somewhere, doing my first year of residency, if I get through the entrance test. So, practically the next two years of our life too, we're to only dream of being with each other. Btw, marriage is a crazy institution. And its event organization, even more whackily crazy. And being the host is like the Prison Of Azkaban. Punishment being meeting people. All the responsibilities of attending a multitude of individuals and the timely execution of the events. Btw, I didn't hate it too much, until the last day when my tempers had already risen, and my moods were a total low, coz he was supposed to be leaving.
It's silly how I'm missing him so much this time. So, see you people later. I ought to talk to him now. Please don't you call the one you love. They might be busy in work or writing an exam or sleeping tight in bed. ;)

PS: I, generally, don't use this kind of English. So, you should drop in the next time for a better class. :)

Feb 28, 2012

Light Switches

The night lights she switches off...
and stares at the radium stars on her ceiling...
observes the wall painting she herself drew, in the dim green rays...
sheds a tear and exhales a heavy breath;

She, then, remembers the sweet romantic conversations,
which are soon to be replaced by spending the nights under another ceiling,
in the arms of the man she loves.

Her eyes not many can read for... with one she cries, the other she smiles...


Not the joker of the pack...

She's the bride-to-be!




PS: Wish life was like lights...A mere click could make us switch various modes.

PPS: The bride has much to handle in her new life, it's her family that has to go through the pain of her absence in their lives.

Images: Google