Diary, 7th Jan'12

Reading was never so good. I somehow feel i wud like to continue reading my subjects more than i thot i was willing to.

And harrison has seriously become interesting. Like that.

The whole adventure of finding d ans and reading frm diff books is a challenge to mental capacity and intellect and i like it.

Tho, a few days back I was clearly pinning against it, infact wanting to sue the aiims ppl for not declaring the questions and their set of answers...now I think, if they hadn't done this, we would have never exercised our brains, and would hv easily mugged up those ans frm d guides out in market, like the majority still does, and cracks exams.

I don't know how my ppr will go, bt m happy for i hv gained knowledge, for d sake of gaining, and giving this xam. I hvn't prepared for clearing this xam, which my colleagues and family members criticize. But, the smart thing is obviously that which i am nt doing. When reading i can't just end up reading wat is asked. I end up reading it in detail. Although tht clears my basics, bt in the long run, keeping in mind the huge huge matter available, remembering and recalling isn't fruitful if u hv nt read selectively. Application is one thing tht this xam sure teaches us.

Phew! Anyways, I'll be having another set of exams in Jan and Feb, and then my Sisters marriage in March. Yes, I am geared up for the battle...i.e. Tomorrow.

And, maybe for every battle there on, for now I know and feel the power of medicine. And, I would rather not quit it. Instead, I'm on a whole diff angle, enjoying it. Yeah!! :)

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Diary, 9th Jan'12:

Weeping in my quilt, I don't hv much to tell you...I have no idea what happened during those 210 minutes. I feel stunned, and after the last night news about the racket...I feel disgusted. Do I have a right to survive in this mean world of medicine without money? I was still happier yesterday...no, I guess...it was all inside me...heating up, accumulating up to burst right now. I feel even more lonely to leave this place at this moment, without a certainity, without a gone-good paper, without my partner...without any happiness at all.
I don't know if I would like to continue it any further. If my efforts are to see this day, I better not keep any hope. Cheated, I feel. Ruined, almost. Though, my knowledge is there with me, but with such betrayals, I feel like dumping it right here. Even if it would have been a bit better, only a bit, I wouldn't have bothered. Oh Phew! I just don't wanna write anymore...I just want to run away, far far away.