HUh!!

Appeared in one more exam...!!
AND Did Very BAADLY !!
huh...
Pitying myself...for not studying ...not studying at all !!
Opened my Ophthal book only for a 3 hour period...IMAGINE...just before the Pre-Universities...Man, I suck !! I am just a hopeless creature on this Big, highly competitive Earth !!
Each day, Each hour, I decided I would study now...but, Nopes, I din't...!!
And you know...I don't feel any remorse...!! Coz I actually din't wanna study...!!
But, after today's plight...
Today's Plight:
Reached the examination hall 15 min late...!!
Saw the paper, and knew, I could manage not more than an hour!!
Started writing, and after flat 45 mins, starting to keep an eye on the watch and my batchmates !
Scribbled some S**T onto the paper...[It is s**t, when you don't know the disease, its definiton, its signs or symptoms, and attempt to answer the treatment given!!]

And there I was, sitting in the hall,
keeping my eyes onto the answer sheet [so that teachers don't get a hit that this girl knows nothing !!],
thinking how can my batchmates ever ask for any EXTRA-sheet [when I couldn't fill even 3 pages of my Main sheet !! and it has some 20 pages.]
feeling shattered for my plain stubbornness for not reading anything !!
making my plans for the coming days and the coming exams, about how I'll cram them, about how I'll develop in me the spirit for studying [ Somehow, the day I entered this college, I have lacked this attitude to study on my own, its only exams that coerce me to study...and I leave the book the moment my calender says, "Exams End!" not picking it up till I am merely 10 days away from the next exams]
And waiting eagerly for someone of my mates to exit the hall, so that, I can follow !!

Finally, after a 2 hour 15 mins jig at the hall,I came out, and had no courage to stay for my friends to come out of the hall and face them...they have all tried their best to motivate me, once, twice, again and again...everytime...!! And I couldn't face them, as I was now realizing my mistake of not listening to them...of not studying !!

So, here I am , Now...
After making a door-poster..saying, that I don't want anyone to disturb me !
After making a Room-Board...where, I have put some Encouraging Words for myself...So that I derive some-kind of motivation to Study !!

So, Bye...I am off to Study !!
Pray for me !!